The Masks We Wear | Purim & Parts Work

The Masks We Wear | Purim & Parts Work

Yesterday was Purim. 
A holiday highlighting the story of a nation who joined together to pray for each other, and a story of hiding, and then coming forward with truth. The day is celebrated by children and adults wearing masks, and costumes, portraying the hiddenness of the story. 
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When I reflect on the concept of masks and wearing costumes, I think about the stories we hold, the pain we contain and the emotions we keep hidden. From ourselves, others and the world. 
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Taking off our masks 

Coming forward with truth is scary. 
It takes courage.
It takes risk.
It takes danger.
And it also brings with it possibly. 
and sometimes, real relief. 

Hiding is painful.

We hide out of necessity - to survive.
To either survive our own pain we are holding - because if we felt it or faced it, it would feel all-consuming, and so we hide or deny the pain.  Or, we may hide the pain from others because we want to shelter them from feeling or seeing what we are holding or tending to. Or, we may want to share it, but sense that they do not have the capacity to support us in it. To hear what we are tending to, navigating or reflecting on. 
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Masks Get Uncomfy with Time 

After wearing a mask or costume for some time, I start feeling stifled. It gets uncomfortable and I need to get a breather. If you've been to a Halloween party, or Purim party, or any dress up party, I image you know what I'm talking about.  And that is why I'm here to share about the concepts of masks- and ask you to take moment to reflect on the masks you are wearing. Maybe it's one. And maybe you need it. But do you have a space or person - or even with yourself- where you can take it off to get some space, air and support?

How to take off our masks 

Here are some ways you can take off your mask

  • Inside / Outside Activity. 

Sit down. Grab a mask - or a sheet of paper. Write on the front of the page/mask the face you're wearing.The part of youthat you're showing to the world. Then flip the mask/page over and write the emotions, memories or thoughts you're holding inside of yourself. You don't need to say or do anything. Just be with what you notice. You may want to take an action - to connect with someone, share what you notice, or you may want to simply be with what you are aware of. 

  • Have the hard conversation.

Have that hard conversation you've been avoiding. That topic that's been weighing on your heart and mind. If you can't talk to the person you're needing to resolve it with, then reach out to a trust mentor or therapist for support. You'll feel lighter after. 

  • Vulnerability is not a dirty word.

Let yourself shed a tear, and/or be a bit more raw with someone in your life that you trust. When we hide behind masks it's because we are often scared (maybe terrified) of being vulnerable. I've seen, how when clients learn to trust, how much more joy, love an connection they feel. The world feels like a more comforting place when we have people we can be real with.
Vulnerability is one of the most beautiful experiences we can have.  

  • Book a session.

One on one therapy can help you learn to be feel more safe being vulnerable. Therapy can help you process pain, blockages and release emotions that are causing you distress. You can feel supported and do the work to feel lighter and more real - with yourself and others.

Work with me- Our staff clinicians are current full. I've gone ahead and opened a few slots on my calendar - to support you. If you'd like to work together you can book a session on my calendar. Scroll to "Therapy with Esther" and if there's an available time, you can book it.   If we are not the right place for you, we can still help! Reach out - and we can connect you with one of our trusted referrals. 
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What mask are you wearing? 

Comment below and share what you’re holding, tending to or noticing for yourself.
Sending strength your way.
 
Warmly,
Esther

Esther GoldsteinComment